Having a BLAST!!If you are my friend on Facebook then you know that I am SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS HAPPY right now. I am doing the happy dance happy. I am over the moon happy. Blissed out happy. Everything is lollipops and rainbows happy.
I am also scared out of my mind.
Many have guessed, and I must confirm, there is a guy in the picture. It's still pretty new and I don't want to jinx it, so I'll just say ... he is a big reason why I have a perma-grin on my face these days.
Things are so good right now, it's a little too much to handle. It's all just a little "too good to be true", ya know? I had three people this week alone tell me, "You deserve this" and you know what? They are right. But really, I don't know many people who don't deserve to be happy.
There is so much going on in my life, and yet, at the same time, there isn't. I only have one more race this year and it's only June! Can you believe it? I must have really been burnt out last year because I only put four tris on the schedule and the last one is July 31st. Ha! I had a couple of crits and road races on the schedule for August but ... the crits were cut due to lack of funding and the road race is the same weekend as Mr. Makes Me Smile's BIG race.
So yeah, after July 31, I'm done with multisport for the year. Wow. So what in the world am I going to do with all my free time?? Buy a cyclocross bike of course! Ha! Ha! I love cross even though I am not very good at it. Cross, in Kansas City anyway, just seems more about the party afterwards than the race before. And come fall, I am all about the PARTY!
But really, with all of this HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY, JOY, JOY, JOY! comes OH MY GAWD - WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING???
To the average person, what's going on in my life might not seem like that big of a deal. I get that. But I am a person who plans EVERYTHING and I must have at least two back-up plans in case Plan A backfires. I don't have that right now. While it's a little liberating and certainly refreshing - surprises around every corner! It's also scary to know you are ... on your own.
Speaking of being on my own, I will take a short hiatus from being coached after my last race. That scares me too. The thing I love most about being coached by Liz, aside from her sassy attitude, is that I feel a certain responsibility and accountability for my work. And I LOVE not having to think about the work - am I doing enough? too much? too little? too hard? too easy? etc. Come August, I will be ON MY OWN (echoing through my head in a baritone voice). Will I let myself go? Party too hard? Eat too many cupcakes? LOSE ALL MY FITNESS and no longer be the hot piece of action I am today?? Oh the horror! GASP!
Shake it off, Flossie!
It's time to embrace the fear! It's time to take some risks and free fall a bit. "Don't fear change - fear not changing!"
If I'm not careful, my face just might freeze like this - with the blissed-out grin from ear to ear. Guess worse things have happened.
I am also scared out of my mind.
Many have guessed, and I must confirm, there is a guy in the picture. It's still pretty new and I don't want to jinx it, so I'll just say ... he is a big reason why I have a perma-grin on my face these days.
Things are so good right now, it's a little too much to handle. It's all just a little "too good to be true", ya know? I had three people this week alone tell me, "You deserve this" and you know what? They are right. But really, I don't know many people who don't deserve to be happy.
There is so much going on in my life, and yet, at the same time, there isn't. I only have one more race this year and it's only June! Can you believe it? I must have really been burnt out last year because I only put four tris on the schedule and the last one is July 31st. Ha! I had a couple of crits and road races on the schedule for August but ... the crits were cut due to lack of funding and the road race is the same weekend as Mr. Makes Me Smile's BIG race.
So yeah, after July 31, I'm done with multisport for the year. Wow. So what in the world am I going to do with all my free time?? Buy a cyclocross bike of course! Ha! Ha! I love cross even though I am not very good at it. Cross, in Kansas City anyway, just seems more about the party afterwards than the race before. And come fall, I am all about the PARTY!
But really, with all of this HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY, JOY, JOY, JOY! comes OH MY GAWD - WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING???
To the average person, what's going on in my life might not seem like that big of a deal. I get that. But I am a person who plans EVERYTHING and I must have at least two back-up plans in case Plan A backfires. I don't have that right now. While it's a little liberating and certainly refreshing - surprises around every corner! It's also scary to know you are ... on your own.
Speaking of being on my own, I will take a short hiatus from being coached after my last race. That scares me too. The thing I love most about being coached by Liz, aside from her sassy attitude, is that I feel a certain responsibility and accountability for my work. And I LOVE not having to think about the work - am I doing enough? too much? too little? too hard? too easy? etc. Come August, I will be ON MY OWN (echoing through my head in a baritone voice). Will I let myself go? Party too hard? Eat too many cupcakes? LOSE ALL MY FITNESS and no longer be the hot piece of action I am today?? Oh the horror! GASP!
Shake it off, Flossie!
It's time to embrace the fear! It's time to take some risks and free fall a bit. "Don't fear change - fear not changing!"
If I'm not careful, my face just might freeze like this - with the blissed-out grin from ear to ear. Guess worse things have happened.
I had a smile on my face just reading this, it's so infectious how happy you are! :-)
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm just sayin' - you sound a lot like I did when I met my SO. I was fresh out of a relationship and NOT looking for it so it was terrible timing but...he made me happy and that was that.
Fun times ahead!
You'll be fine on your own! You need it. Have fun doing as you please. It's just a short break. I'll put ya back on the leash if you get too unruly. Keepin' my eye on you, Flossie... :)
ReplyDeleteyay for being happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteHey, fall.. I wont be pregnant! I can enjoy a boulevard and watch you race! YAY!